The Horrible History of Miserable Men

As part of my "I Need To Grow Up" regime i have taken to reading more grown-up newspapers, namely The Times. Now the newspaper itself i not really my cup of tea as the layout is slightly dull and not all of the articles are as interesting as i would like. However, they do allocate space in the newspaper for very interesting articles about people. I think it has already been established in this blog how interesting i find the lives of others, no matter who they are, and the newspaper is an endless source of material on how other people do the things they do. In the Sunday Times Magazine i was enthralled to learn about Richard Caring, the owner of many established restauants and clubs, notably The Ivy in London. His, literal, rags to riches story was not only informative bt also put you in the mindset of how this man works. Bitterly apparently.

Yesterday i thought i would follow the trend of being grown up by, again, chosing The Times as my reading material. I came across this article about acclaimed children's non-fiction writer Terry Deary. I was an avid fan of his Horrible Histories book and thought the way it dealt with the grittier aspects of history was far more entertaining than the banalty of the classroom. The series began in 1993 with The Awesome Egyptians and the series developed from there. The books wold top best selling lists across the board and found their way into the nations history loving hearts. My personal favourite was The Terrible Tudors. I already loved learning about the Henry's at school and this book fueled the passion further. This snippet shows completely my love for the books:

Tudor doctors had some herbs that worked but may of their cures were just sad and silly superstitions. Here are a few of the wacky (but true) Tudor cures:

Got a headache? Then rub your forehead a rope that was used to hang a criminal. Suffer from rheumatism? Then wear the skin of a donkey. In pain with gout? Boil a red-haired dog in oil, add worms and the marrow from pig bones. Rub the mixture in. A painful liver? Drink a pint of ale every morning for a week - with nine head-lice drowned in it.

Are you bald? Use a shampoo made from the juice of crushed beetles. When the head is clean then rub in grease made from the fat of a dead fox. Are you a martyr to asthma? Swallow young frogs or live spiders, cover them in butter to help them slide down easier. Other crazy cures included powdered human skull, bone-marrow mixed with sweat, a stone that has killed a she-bear and fresh cream mixed with the blood of a black cat's tail.

Tasty treats! You'd soon be out of your sick bed if you were offered those poisonous panaceas.

Not only is the piece written in a whimsical yet intelligent fashion, it makes you want to read more. After the nostaligia for how much i liked the books wore off i realised that the writer of such cleverness was in fact a quite miserable man. He personally slags off historian Niall Ferguson (of whom i know little of but i am sure such a personal attack is because of a dispute between the two rather than a professional dig) and claims that all historians are "obnoxious" and that publishing is "the seediest profession i 've worked in". From the offset it becomes apparent that Deary likes to work on the outside of society. His books already tested the national currculam and has been quoted in saying that schools:

"have no relevance in the 21st century. They were a Victorian idea to get kids off the street. Who decided that putting 30 kids with only their age in common in a classroom with one teacher was the best way of educating? At my school there were 52 kids in the class and all I learned was how to pass the 11-plus. Testing is the death of education. Kids should leave school at 11 and go to work."

Now i could quite agree with the fact that schooling does only teach you how to pass the exams that are in place, but education is a fundamental part of growing up and who you are is developed by going to school regardless of what is being taught in the classroom. Education teaches you what things you are interested in, whether you are theory or practice, whether you are social or non-social, how to speak in front of others, having confidence in things you produce and the understanding of rejection.

In the article itself, Deary is painted as a bitter man. His main recognition is for the Horrible History series when it becomes apparent that he is far more proud of the other work he has produced. His hatred for publishing probably comes from the limited success his other work has achieved. His hatred for historians seems to come from the doubt that they have had in his work to succeed. He says he does not want to be "churning out the same old thing" when he gets to 74 but the man seems in no way grateful for the platform these books have given him.

It would seem that for a man who openly dispells the education system, he did not grasp on to the life lessons that the establishment can offer. He end the piece with "I never wanted to write in the first place". Well Deary, we already have your masterpieces, maybe it is time for you to quit whilst ahead.